Yussif Ahmed Ibn Yussif

I have lots of aspirations But I don’t know when I will die I don’t know which of my aspirations I will fulfill before I die What if I am unable to fulfill any of them In the next decade, I would have become a published author I would have become a journalist I would have studied for my master’s degree I would have been an entrepreneur I would have been studying law I wouldn’t have been married yet, maybe I would have put up a building or buying one These aren’t all I want to do All I these I want to do before I turn forty Barack Obama says it is not enough to go through life with only passion, You’ve got to have a plan as well Well, I have plans Roadmaps to achieving my goals But some roadmaps lead to dead-ends I am not my only responsibility I have four younger sisters and a ‘son’ to take care of They would’ve been my father’s responsibility But I watched him take his last breathe just a few months ago So the mantle now falls on me to be the man of the house

It’s 5:38 am and I just returned home from the mosque I went to pray But I felt preyed I couldn’t focus on prayer I don’t know if it’s a betrayal I don’t really know how I feel right now But nothing feels right This isn’t a poem nor is it a narration…. I don’t know what it is…… it may make sense, it may not…… If you find any errors in this write-up, pardon me. I can’t read it after I have written it. Just walk with me to the end I DON’T KNOW IF THE MEMORIES OF HOW I HELPED HONOUR YOU WITH The LAST BATHE AND HAVING TO HOLD YOUR HEAD AND SHOULDERS WHILE WE LOWERED YOU INTO YOUR GRAVE WILL EVER FADE AWAY. Today is Monday, a working day I am committed to giving my best at work But my emotions are derailing my intention My supervisor has a theory; don’t let you're personal interfere with your professional But how can I be efficient when I can’t even think straight He was my one and only father and father-figure all in one My mom called me into a corner and with tears