BEING AN ADDICT

You know how they tell you to avoid the things that trigger you to sin or go wayward?

What if you are your own trigger?

How do you avoid yourself?

My name is Yussif Ahmed Ibn Yussif

I am a Muslim

But I am also an addict

Anyone who really knows me knows that I would never criticize anyone based on morality

Because I am no different

I am somewhat morally corrupt

Because of my addiction

Well, my addiction hurts no one

It only hurts me

I’ve tried to stop it for so many years now

But my efforts have been futile

Because I always eventually go back to it

I have always wanted to talk about it

Well, I have talked about.

Three individuals know about my addiction

I told these people because I felt so lonely and very scared

And I also did because I wanted their help to break my addiction

Unfortunately, telling them about it made no difference

I am still an addict

And I want it to stop

I’ve been an addict for more than a decade

And I want it to end now

Ruth, Ernestina, Khadija, I have wanted to try telling someone again

But I am afraid of two things

It might not yield the results I need, just like before and I don’t know what they’ll think of me after I tell them

So you see, we all keep secrets

But only because it’s unpleasant

I need help to free myself from this addiction

I’ve tried doing it on my own terms but it didn’t work

So, I need extra strength, influence and pressure

Talk to your friends, siblings, colleagues

Ask them what they are struggling with

But find it impossible to share with others

Be a true friend

Find their secrets and keep them as secrets

And help them

My name is Yussif Ahmed Ibn Yussif

And I am an addict who needs help breaking free